Wednesday, April 18, 2007

In memoriam

whoever finds love beneath hurt and grief
disappears into emptiness with a thousand new disguises.
-Rumi



My family invites you to join us to knit* for the families of the victims in Blacksburg. We would like to knit a comfort item for each family over the next few weeks. This is going to be a challenging project given the horrific number of victims, but we unfortunately know from personal experience that timeliness is important. We are thinking smaller items like little blankets or scarves that can be cuddled would be ideal.

[*sewing and crochet are also obviously welcome.]

What we would like to do is try and customize the item to each victim by using information provided here as it becomes available. If you can help, please post your adopted family in the comments so that we can make sure each family is included.

Denise has generously granted permission to use her photo of Bleeding Heart blossoms as an icon:


Please feel free to cross-post this icon and links to this page so that we can try and complete the project as quickly as possible.

my brother is...

normal normal normal normal normal normal
normal normal normal normal normal normal
NORMAL NORMAL NORMAL NORMAL NORMAL NORMAL
NORMAL NORMAL NORMAL NORMAL NORMAL NORMAL
NORMAL NORMAL NORMAL NORMAL NORMAL NORMAL
NORMAL NORMAL NORMAL NORMAL NORMAL NORMAL
NORMAL NORMAL NORMAL NORMAL NORMAL NORMAL
NORMAL NORMAL NORMAL NORMAL NORMAL NORMAL
NORMAL NORMAL NORMAL NORMAL NORMAL NORMAL
NORMAL NORMAL NORMAL NORMAL NORMAL NORMAL
NORMAL NORMAL NORMAL NORMAL NORMAL NORMAL

NORMAL NORMAL NORMAL NORMAL NORMAL NORMAL
NORMAL NORMAL NORMAL NORMAL NORMAL NORMAL
NORMAL NORMAL NORMAL NORMAL NORMAL NORMAL
normal normal normal normal normal normal
normal normal normal normal normal normal

Tuesday, April 17, 2007

fun times, close calls, and more waiting

with about 80,000 other things to attend to, i had not really noticed the move to Tennessee hurtling in from the horizon until i went home to visit a few weeks ago. my chores between now and July 1 are as follows: finish dissertation revisions and submit to graduate school, finish and submit four scientific papers to scientific journals, find place to live, get requisite three moving quotes so UT can pick the cheapest, go to Arizona for all of May to earn spare cash for the move, complete two scientific posters and a short lecture for presentation at ACVIM (June 6-10), go to the eye doctor, pack, get suitcase fixed at special repair place an hour away, get materials to start developing advanced procedures laboratory and clinical service, move ~ June 15 and start work at UT July 1. oh yeah, and breathe.

whew!

obviously, some of these things need to be done sooner than others. figuring the threat of potential homelessness was one of the greater potential stressors, we decided to head to Knoxville for the weekend to find a place to live. in typical family fashion we made a festival of it with Mom, Rol, Bill* and Kelly all in tow for the search.



Dippy me forgot to get a photo before Bill & Kelly
left so i pasted them into this one!

*and Bill's lover, Matilda, their car's GPS vixen. Kelly calls her Lolita and i suspect will eventually install a hack to change her to a him. :)

Saturday we drove around like crazy people, from possibility to possibility without really seeing 'the one'. with desperation quietly pressing in, we decided to call places that hadn't returned my calls thus far which is how we found Eva. she is one of two people that manage a series of townhomes that looked really promising on paper. Eva was more than somewhat brusque at first - it turns out she was having a really bad day - but our good attitude is generally contagious, she is generally delightful and i up the ante by giving her emergency chocolate (Cadbury milk chocolate with almonds) from my purse. TraVy's dog is bit over their weight restrictions but we are hopeful that my excellent references, credit and qualifications will tip the scales. by the time we left, Eva was onboard, working her boss to get us the place, and providing helpful move-in phone numbers and tips. we will hopefully hear this week, so keep your fingers crossed!

the weekend was wonderfully fun and an overall success. Sunday was cold and rainy, but Monday was clear and we enjoyed toodling about campus before making our way leisurely to the airport. TraVy and i had an unnervingly close call as the first of our flights yesterday was landing. the plane was less than 10 feet from the ground when suddenly we shot back up at a 45 degree angle (though it felt more like 60). i thought, 'Well, at least everyone who needs to knows I love them.'

the plane tossed about rather wildly before leveling out, at which point the flight attendant came on to say, 'Trust me, it is a good thing we didn't land just then. The captain should be on shortly to explain.' apparently the captain was too busy trying to land the plane he second time round because he never did explain.

not knowing is way worse than knowing the worst for me so the second approach was beyond stressful. as an aside, i did learn that i fear makes me knit much much faster. the plane shimmied about erratically, almost as if there was equipment malfunctioning, but eventually we spotted some flags flailing in fierce winds. apparently the wind shear shot up during our first approach. the engine alarms were fierce enough to be audible to the flight attendant through the cockpit door. thankfully, the captain was on his toes, reacted quickly and averted disaster.


Falling leaves
Originally uploaded by jacquichris.
with all the flying and driving and flying and fear, i did get a lot done, knit-wise. i finished up the Falling leaves socks - knit with Senso on US 2s with 60 stitches instead of 72. i think they turned out rather cute. i will have to make another pair using yarn so the pattern can be appreciated because i think blocking these would diminish their silliness. although it was nice to knock out a pair of socks for $3 and the cotton will rock for summer, i don't recommend using Senso this way. it has no give so all the SSK and K2tog ended up hard on the fingers.


Argosy plus
Originally uploaded by jacquichris.
i hit the halfway point on the Argosy, which continues to please me immensely. between waiting in lines, some car knitting and bouts of severe turbulence when patterned knitting was not possible, i knit most of another pair of plain socks for TraVy using Opal and US 2s.

my brother had to reschedule his CT for today so he could attend a funeral. [yes, i am serious. our lives are really like this.] he had the scan today and i expect to receive a call by midday tomorrow from his doctor with the results. in the meantime, i am trying to focus on completing bureaucratic forms and adjusting the plans for Arizona. again, the not knowing really sucks. i have cast on my sock pal's sockmate twice so far today without managing to correctly follow the instructions. perhaps the third time is the charm... or perhaps i just need to force the cats off of my chest before casting on...

Thursday, April 12, 2007

i don't want to say 'i told you so'

right after my brother was first hospitalized for 'possibly dying', he rechecked with a primary care physician. the doctor, Dr. N we will call him, basically took the history, said, 'hypertension, right' and scheduled him for a recheck in a month. when Dr. N told me his 'plan,' an extended dialogue ensued that went something like this: [NOTE: You can skip to the bottom of the blockquote to minimize your pain if you have difficulty substituting Charlie Brown 'WAA WANH' for medical jargon.]

Dr N: I set an appointment for your brother to recheck in a month.
Me: You what? I'm sorry. Maybe I am missing something. You aren't going to check him for microalbuminuria, consider advanced imaging or run any blood work?
Dr N: He said he is feeling fine now and his BP is much better.
Me: How is 156/86 much better than 146/80?
Dr N: Well, one of his diastolics was over 120 so it is much better.
Me: When was it over 120? The highest number I was provided was 111.
Dr N: Well, I don't have the actual numbers or records, but... He says he feels fine now. So it obviously responded to the medication.
Me: What about the episode 3 weeks ago that resolved without treatment?
Dr N: Um. Oh.
Me: So you think it is okay for him to be driving around and climbing on rooftops when we don't know what happened or if it could just hit again?
Dr N: Well, the patient needs to take some responsibility. If he has symptoms, he shouldn't climb on a roof.
Me: So if he has advanced knowledge of impending acute onset of symptoms, he should divine not to get on a roof?... You are not going to even run a microalbuminuria assay to determine whether the hypertension was truly significant enough to cause encephalopathy? Or whether he should start ACE inhibitor therapy?
Dr N: I'm going to do it next month.
Me: ... when you won't know whether a normal test means the beta blocker is helping or whether it means hypertension was not relevant to the initial symptoms? I'm sorry. I am really not trying to be difficult but I must be missing something...
Dr N: I really don't think it is justified to run thousands of dollars of tests when we don't know what is wrong.
Me: The urine assay is cheap and will at least tell us whether this makes sense as a cause of his signs.
Dr N: But what if its positive? Then what am I to do?
Me: [long pause] Well, I don't entirely know right this second. But... no offense but...

Inability to develop an appropriate follow-up diagnostic plan does not justify inaction.

this went on at length until i could have screamed. finally i decided to just tell my brother what tests he needed so we could make sure nothing jumped up to bite us in the collective patoot later.

Dr N wrapped up (quite stuffily) with 'I will convey your concerns to your brother.'

whatever.

i called my bro and, in the interim, Dr N spoke to a human renal specialist who agreed with me [like that is a surprise]. Dr. N called my brother and volunteered an amended plan.

where am i going with this?

well, he had the urine test, which was positive, so they started him on ACE inhibitor therapy. they also scheduled an ultrasound of his kidneys for yesterday to stage blood flow etc. i approved wholeheartedly and my brain phased into chronic hypertension management but...

Dr. N called today to say that they may have found a possible mass/cyst/item on/in/near his kidney. they will be doing a CT on Monday to evaluate the area further and determine if there is a mass and, if so, what is involved. this is a test i almost convinced them to run when he was still hospitalized, since a type of adrenal tumor (pheochromocytoma) can cause intermittent severe hypertensive episodes and we do not really have a compelling history of essential hypertension in the family. once we discovered my brother was accidentally spiking his blood pressure by using an OTC nasal spray, i put the possibility of an adrenal mass out of my mind. now, given the ultrasound findings, it is back.

this may very well be nothing...

but it may not...


i find myself thinking over and over and over again, 'There isn't supposed to be anything. The tests are supposed to shake out as Essential Hypertension with iatrogenic exacerbation. Dr. N is supposed to think, "It all came out fine. That will show his pain in the ass sister... but it is better medicine this way and I will sleep better knowing the answers." He is not supposed to have to hang his head and order more tests dammit. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABLE TO SAY "I TOLD YOU SO!!!!"'

it doesn't make sense to borrow trouble. if there is something to worry about, it will be here soon enough. if there is not, it is silly to have wasted bits of life worrying about nothing.

not too surprisingly given our recent family history, i have not had much luck today with not worrying...

Tuesday, April 10, 2007

chasing my tail


Spinny Bunt surprises
Originally uploaded by jacquichris.
between incapacitation from jaw pain and Esther's 'post-operative complications', i have made almost no progress on catching up. happily, the world spins on without me.

my sock from Lara arrived today, envelope somewhat punctured but with contents intact. the sock is gorgeous- Knitpicks Victorian Diamond Top Socks in Knitpicks Gloss, burgundy. i am itching to get the second sock done so i can sport them about town. in addition, she included a truly delightful skein of Fancy Image merino in the happiest peach and melon shades and imported milk chocolate. with Esther on the mend again, i was able to finish out my return sock package and [finally] get it in the mail.


Argosy and Falling Leaves
Originally uploaded by jacquichris.
the tulip socks cast off on Saturday, leaving me at loose ends with cranky jaw. to avoid accidentally exacerbating matters, i decided to cast on Argosy in Noro Silk Garden Lite. normally i knit like i cook -substitution, substitution, substitution! - but i could not shake my fascination with the color play in the pattern photos. it is turning out even lovelier in person and i look forward to blocking it.

i could not entirely abandon socks since the pattern for Falling Leaves kept taunting me from the end table. i have already torn it out twice and ended up reducing the final stitch count by 12 for this third try. it is looking good so far, but i certainly won't be holding my breath.

what else? after working on revisions to my dissertation for awhile, i shifted gears and hauled out my boss's scanner. i brought back a slew of my grandmother Mickey's pictures after her death in August and have been scanning in and restoring them as best i can. so far i have scanned 167 pictures and there are probably another 75-100 to go. once the pictures are all scanned, the fam will review and provide details for the complete archive. finally, we are going to print custom photo albums for family of the photos of their choice with relevant comments. where am i going with this?

i bring you the hidden jewel i found during today's scanfest- a photo of my late grandmother Mickey with budgie. Enjoy!


Sunday, April 08, 2007

oh oh oh...


Monkey socks
Originally uploaded by jacquichris.
such sorrow. such pain. a serious knitting injury. okay. maybe only sort of knitting related... but first a knitting update.

i did indeed finish the monkey socks on Friday. i had been very stressed about running out of yarn, but ended up having plenty. well, not exactly. the leftover yarn is to the right of my feet and there was obviously no danger of running out but... i hit a knot when i was moving into shaping for the second toe. as will be apparent to any knitter, the yarn downstream was definitely from another dye lot. i considered frogging and making something else with the yarn but in the end decided not to. i don't wear socks with sandals so no one but me will know. given how delicious it is, this won't turn me off of Jitterbug but i will make sure to watch carefully for knots when the hanks are wound.


Easter socks!
Originally uploaded by jacquichris.
Friday, after picking up Esther and getting her shoe situation sorted out, i stopped by the local Hancock's Fabrics. it is a remarkably hideous place and is actually being closed. yes, indeedy. you know where i am headed with this- Store Closing Sale.

yarn was on sale 50% off but because it is an awful store, the purchases were quite limited. in the end, although i could find no yarn, i did find a reasonable amount of happily colored crochet thread (DMC Senso) that i suspected would work for socks. i have been wanting to make the Yarn Harlot's tulip socks so this made for a lovely opportunity to test drive both the thread and the pattern. i am almost done with the second sock and think the light cotton will make for perfect summer socks. (Note: they shouldn't be baggy on the intended recipient.)

the injury? oh yeah.

yesterday i woke up to discover i had dislocated my TMJ meniscus in my sleep in spite of my splint. OW! can i say OW again? this is worse than a standard dislocation because it doesn't reduce the way a lockjaw does. how does a jaw problem tie to knitting? most of the problem is from my jaw conformation and ongoing financial and emotional stress, but i do wear a splint at night and guard against things that may exacerbate my TMJ. while knitting yesterday, i suddenly realized that i may have caused the new dislocation myself!

i am a bit of a sock scofflaw. to avoid ladders in my socks, i track the needle stitches- you know, Needle 1, Needle 2, Needle 3- with safety pin stitch markers and knit two extra stitches across the end of each DPN so the work migrates, if that makes sense. this means i end up with an empty extra needle for two stitches three times a round. i am working on sliding it into my hand to increase my speed but still have a tendency to hold the extra DPN in my mouth. what i hadn't realized was how much strain this places on my jaw.

oy. OY!

talking, eating, yawning- all bad. my plans for Easter at Denny's are out. it could only make things worse. instead i am home being as quiet as possible and limiting my food intake to mushy items. sigh.

Friday, April 06, 2007

knittacular


'Comfort scarf' on TravY
Originally uploaded by jacquichris.
all the excitement about my Defense and personal nonsense has pushed knitting content to the back burner. time to catch up...

Monday i was pretty stressed between worrying about me, my Defense, my family's various and sundry near misses with death, my dear friends' cat. this whole obsession with my my me disgusted me so i decided to take a break to focus on someone else.

i whipped out the Comfort Scarf yarn i had been assiduously avoiding since frogging it for too closely resembling an Elmo scalping. in an attempt to get around the pelt feel, i bumped my needles up to US 13s. i used a slanting edge and took the scarf out pretty wide for the body so that it could be used as a head wrap as well as scarf. before i knew it, i had completed the cast off. i still think it looks like Elmo meets Hannibal Lector but TraVy says its quite comfy so we are going to leave it at that.


Monkey sock
Originally uploaded by jacquichris.
the Monkey socks are cruising along quite well. i anticipate casting off the second sock today. i'm using Jitterbug sock yarn in Blue Parrot and US 1s. the yarn has spiraling color patches (feathers i suppose) that pool interestingly as a result of the K2tog / YOs. i actually really like the way they are turning out and the dyes are so rich and soft a girl could just drown in them.

last night Jen and i went to Denver to see the Yarn Harlot Stephanie Pearl-McPhee at the Tattered Cover. Jen and i can't decide which was better - Stephanie's talk or watching 200 people click-clack along in their own special ways on their projects.


Stephanie Pearl-McPhee
Originally uploaded by jacquichris.
i gave Stephanie a little Army man to cover her back next time she flies through O'Hare. Stephanie brought the Bohus and, as i touched it, i surrendered to the fumes. Travy has offered to get me the kit i have been ogling to celebrate my successful Defense and i no longer have the willpower to resist...

finally, the irises Steinie sent me have really opened up so i was able to get a good photo for you all:

Thursday, April 05, 2007

this shouldn't be funny

my Type A personality makes me an early person. not a morning person but an early person. for big events, i tend to struggle and stress and then find i am ready three days in advance with nothing but the slow click of the second hand on the clock to distract me. that is when i tend to get unreasonable with regard to those around me.

in theory, it isn't possible to be early for a Defense, because there is always one more paper you haven't read, one more flow problem in the slides. but eventually a person hits the point where even one more thing learned will cause something much more important to fall out one's ear. i hit this point Friday. i still had 3 days of slide revisions to go, but there was simply no option for further accretion of data. because i spent most of 2007 in hermiit-mode in anticipation of this turn of events, it didn't really affect anyone else. Travy is easygoing enough that he just simultaneously coddled and ignored me.

knowing this about myself, i was very careful not to leave too early on Tuesday for the hospital. too much time waiting there would just whip me into an inchoate frenzy. i got up and read email. made my first latte and checked blogs. pet the cats and studied my yarn. eventually i showered and made a second latte. after dressing, i set aside two extras of most things in case of emergency. i packed up all my books and articles. loading the car was done in stages to best mete out time. finally, i packed up my ninjas (Thank you again, Denise!) and left for work. it was still too early (11 am) but there was nothing left with which to distract myself at home.

pulling into the parking lot, i heard a subtle clicking noise. Esther doesn't make clicky noises. i parked, exited and looked back from whence i came to note 'water' trailing about 100 yards.

hmm.

i walked around to the passenger side of the car to unload her and discovered coolant pooling round the front tire, like blood around a gunshot victim in a movie. the pool had grown past 18 inches in diameter in the time it took me to walk from the left of the car to the right.

'This can't be good,' i think to myself.

'This is going to be expensive,' i think to myself.

'This is actually kind of funny,' i think to myself and then worry the pressure has finally made me snap. but really, it was kind of funny because it was fit the flow of the rest of my life so well.

i wanted to clean things up - it is a vet hospital after all - but the fluid just kept coming, i was already girlified, and i no idea what other surprises might await me. so i made my way inside with all my books, clothes, computer, peripherals and food for attendees.

i called the mechanic who recommended i just drive the car over when the Defense was past - in spite of the lack of coolant. 'There must be some still in the system.' anyone else notice how men always assume women are exaggerating when it comes to cars or construction?


on to the Defense... my talk clocked at around 75 minutes, before questions. the attendance was significant, in sharp contrast to my Prelim. people were interested. the talk with questions ended up running two hours. we took a short break, during which i ended up continuing to answer questions. i reconvened with my committee to answer any further questions. given the strong audience participation, most of their questions had been addressed already. this portion lasted 30 minutes at most. they excused me for deliberations which lasted a grand total of two minutes based on the call time of my update to Trav.

and then it was over.

i hefted the books back to my office where a dozen irises were waiting from Steinie. [i will post a picture soon but am waiting as they are still opening up.] i hitched a ride with my boss to a nearby bar for our celebratory drink. poor Esther had created quite a mess by this time but appeared to still be hemorrhaging coolant...


Just a little leak
Originally uploaded by jacquichris.

since my boss had a lecture to give that evening, we went at a bar near the hospital to start. the bartender Bradford swore he could make a margarita to rival the Rio's. the ninjas liked this marg but didn't agree that it bested a Rio marg...


Ninja mania
Originally uploaded by jacquichris.

LAP's wife and my dear dear friend kittyCat joined us and gave the ninjas and me a lift to the Rio to celebrate in style. all the lab girls turned out for the fun, which meant a lot to me. TraV of course was there and LAP joined us after his lecture. we all had far too much tequila, esp the ninjas who got quite belligerent. as you can see here, Cat and i had to break up a couple ninja fights:



Originally uploaded by jacquichris.

yesterday i spent righting my apartment and my liver. eventually i biked in to campus to turn in my Final Examination Results form and then to the hospital to have the car towed to the shop. sadly, Esther's water pump blew. it will be about a grand to get her back in fighting trim. after quite lengthy discussions with the auto mechanic, my mother, Roland and TraV, i have decided to stand by my car instead of abandoning her for someone younger, sexier and under warranty. what the hell. life is a crap shoot.

tonight, Jen, the ninjas and i are going to Denver to see the Yarn Harlot. it should be a grand time and a nice way to celebrate.

Monday, April 02, 2007

my mantra...



and now 2 hours 49 minutes later, i can state I PASSED I PASSED I PASSED I PASSED I PASSED I PASSED I PASSED...

more later...

have you ever noticed how...

just when you think you cannot stand another minute, life suddenly brings you sunshine and puppy dog tails?

Bob the Carpenter just arrived to continue putting back up my kitchen wall. yes, it really has been 6 weeks since they tore it out. that may deserve its own post, but i just try not to think about it.

anyway, Bob asked whether i knew there was a package on the stoop... which i didn't.

out i popped to discover a box courtesy of my recently made e-friend Denise. even before opening it, i was all full of happy squiggles. Travy has made it his mission to change things, but it is still pretty rare for me to be the spoilee instead of the caretaker.

so many delightful surprises awaited me. i felt like Amahl when Caspar reveals his lovely secrets:

This is my box, this is my box.
I never travel without my box.
In the first drawer I keep...

my magic stones
JAM! Homemade happy jam!



Presents from Denise (Unravelled)!
Originally uploaded by jacquichris.


This is my box, this is my box.
I never travel without my box.
In the second drawer I keep...

all my beads. Oh, how I love to play with beads!
Kittycats. And yummy, energizing soap!


This is my box, this is my box.
I never travel without my box.
In the third drawer-
Oh, little boy! Oh, little boy!
In... the third... drawer... I keep...

LICORICE! LICORICE!
BLACK SWEET LICORICE, BLACK SWEET LICORICE!

LORNA'S LACES! SOFT, SUPPLE LACES!
SOOTHING VIBRANT LACES!

HAVE SOME!
Its all MINE!



Presents from Denise (Unravelled)!
Originally uploaded by jacquichris.


really, truly there aren't words to share how very special this generous and thoughtful box of wonders is to me. i may even sneak the Laces in to watch my Defense...

Thanks so much Denise. You truly are the best!

frogs everywhere

i just tore out my second sock in a week. [grumble grumble.] TraV reminded me that this is part of freestylin' new things, but that doesn't mean i ain't grumpy about it.

like that is what my grumptacular state is really about. (and yes, that is an intentionally abandoned preposition. i like to deliberately abuse grammar when cranky.)


Yuppie socks
Originally uploaded by jacquichris.
i do have knitting progress that has thus far gone unreported. firstly is a lovely pair of robin's egg blue felted slippers for Mom. they turned out quite beautiful so of course i forgot to take a picture. i do have pictures of the matching socks Travy wanted. we can now exude sock yuppiedom as we stroll casually in our matching Regia wonders.

yesterday i finished the second version of a sock for Spinny Bunt Lara. [the first got frogged after i confused it so much i could find no way to salvage.] pictures will have to wait since i want the finished product to be a surprise.

two sock projects cling valiantly to their needles - a pair of green and white plain socks for Travy in squishilicious Opal and a pair of Cookie A's monkey socks in 'to die for' Jitterbug for me me me! sadly, the toe-up diamond panel ankle socks i started have leapt bravely into the nether after recognizing their ridiculous largeness. they look forward to coming back sized for a human person in the nearish future.


finally, the hydrangea Travy got me is still gorgeous. so gorgeous that i have to share:

Thursday, March 29, 2007

Mom headlines the VU webpage

today we have a bit of fun for a change! Mom is currently headlining the Vanderbilt University homepage. and yes, she really is that dynamic in daily living.

also, my brother has been released from the hospital. we are not sure yet what is going on with him, but stroke, heart attack and brain aneurysm (i.e. actively dying) have all been ruled out. (thank you-know-who.) now the questions remain: did the episodes truly resulted from hypertensive encephalopathy or is the hypertension a red herring? why is Brian having fairly marked hypertension when he was normotensive just a few months ago? is Milla Jovovich as badass in person as she is in the movies? these questions and more to (hopefully) be answered in our next episode...

this quote, courtesy of my brother, after a long discourse between his doctor and me regarding SOTA (state of the art) for hypertension and lightheadedness/presyncopal episodes:
"Your sister sure knows an awful lot about human medicine for a veterinarian."

Tuesday, March 27, 2007

exhaustion

things continue to be crazy here. as much as i would like to continue keeping things close to the chest, i feel like-for my sake-i have to abandon that approach.

in addition to the Defense and the cat and the apartment demolition, things have actually been more than a little bit stressful on the personal front. three weeks ago, while on choir tour, Mom had a drug reaction to a new medication. she had a grand mal seizure, necessitating hospitalization. at that time, it was discovered that she also had severe hyponatremia (low blood sodium), probably secondary to a long-term reaction to her blood pressure medication. she was released after 24 hour observation but has had severe rib and back pain since that time which is only partially controlled with pain medications.

as you can imagine, this has played havoc with her morale and really negatively affected her ability to believe that things are eventually going to get better. waking up in the hospital all 'broken' again with no understanding of why just harkens too strongly back to the accident.

Roland and i decided that a surprise visit might be just the thing to improve morale and so i flew home Thursday for a long weekend visit. Roland met me at the airport after running to the grocery store. Mom suspected nothing and it was just wonderful to surprise her so!

Friday was a great day of fun and frivolity. Saturday we completed an epic amount of chores before meeting up with Kelly and Bill for dinner. it was spectacular to be all together again. actually the whole weekend was quite special and lovely for us all. Sunday, unfortunately, Roland lost his balance working in the yard and fell - bashing his head against a concrete water diverter. in addition to abrasions on both forearms, he sustained a cut down to the cartilage of his left ear and a 3 inch full thickness laceration (to the bone) on the back of his head. this sent us back to the hospital - after two hours and three frustrating attempts to get him seen at an urgent care center. Roland ended up needing a head CT - which thankfully was normal - as well as 4 stitches in his ear and roughly 10 staples in his skull. he was quite the trooper about it all. we finally made it home for dinner just before 10pm. Roland noted that now he and Mom will have matching scars since his laceration is the same place she had her craniotomy.

Monday, Mom had an appointment with a physical therapist about her side. as ever, getting things sorted out for the appointment was an epic ordeal, but the appointment itself was very helpful. it turns out that, during the seizure and associated fall, one of Mom's ribs got jammed in a cocked back position. it is not moving normally with the rest of her ribs, which is causing high shearing pressures on the associated muscles. the therapist was actually surprised that she was doing as well as she is. the good news is that it should be completely fixable with appropriate therapy.

with my Defense fast approaching, i flew back last night. Trav met me at the airport and brought me home. he had straightened and stocked emergency rations and got me the most lovely hydrangea. it was all just so sweet of him!

this morning, i headed in for a recheck appointment for Zaney before planning to buckle down on my Defense preparations. partway through the appointment, i received a call from Mom that my brother was being hospitalized for severe dizziness. it turns out this is the second episode of dizziness he has experienced in the past couple weeks. thus far, all tests (blood work, EKG, chest radiographs, head CT etc) are normal with the exception of moderate hypertension. although his blood pressure does not seem high enough to be causing his symptoms, they are trying treatment of it first, since they can find nothing else wrong. we will just have to wait and see what happens. brain MRI may be the next step.

because i was concerned about missing something given my state of mind, another doctor is taking over on Zaney. i feel terrible, like i am letting my friends down as both a friend and doctor, but i cannot risk overlooking something.

now i am home, receiving intermittent medical updates and trying to get cat vomit out of the couch. as you can imagine, i am no longer particularly in a place to work on my Defense. with only a week remaining though, i haven't much choice. i could contact my committee about rescheduling, but honestly i need to do this. rescheduling would just make me feel even more like i need to just give up on my life and career so i can care for everyone else. if i have to cancel the Defense, i suspect i might not reschedule. ever. i might just give up.

the thought of giving up just feet from the finish line brings me such exquisite sorrow, i cannot bear to face it.

so cross your fingers and pray i can do this. i just really need a win, since life is apparently never going to ease up on the bit.

Wednesday, March 21, 2007

step 2: check!

completing a PhD is kind of like completely an epic backpack - a Pacific Crest or Appalachian Trail backpack. it doesn't proceed as one would expect and years can be spent struggling without achieving any appreciable progress. there are heady moments when one finishes writing a grant or gets results back from the statistician, but more often days are filled with abusive reviewer comments*, incomprehensible experimental technique failures, and long periods of slow slogging.

to keep from getting lost in the hugeness of it all, i made a 'To Do' list when i started the PhD. this list broke down everything for every project in play and planned and i update it regularly. it is this list that has kept me going, because a PhD is huge, but 'Finish literature search' and 'Follow-up with statistician' are manageable. recognizing this, i have taken the same approach to the Defense. step 1 was getting it to my boss. step 2 is getting it to my committee. step 3 - prepare slides for my talk, study and plan follow-up experiments so i can field potential questions best. step 4 - defend. step 5 - either celebrate or fall in front of a truck (or perhaps one too many margs to temporarily drown my sorrows). the steps definitely help, especially given my new friends Insomnia and Probable Gastric Ulcer.

yesterday morning i turned my dissertation in to my committee. to celebrate with me, Mom sent me these lovely flowers. they really brighten up the place and my spirits. i started my slides yesterday, but didn't push myself too hard. i was pretty fried and figured it would be better to recuperate than work inefficiently. the weather was nice enough that i was also able to fit in a 7 mile bike ride in doing errands. today i have an appointment to recheck my 'niece' Zane and then home to work on slides and future research 'directions'.


Rainbow trouts
Originally uploaded by jacquichris.
last night i did finish the fish socks. they are Knitty Pomatomus pattern using Marks and Kattens Clown on US 1s. i think they turned out very nicely and take pleasure in thinking of them as 'Rainbow trout' - even though no one else seems to appreciate the almost humor. cast on the yarn for a sock swap sock. pretty excited about it, and i think i ended up with just the right yarn.

have to get back to work now... sigh.

*anonymity can release otherwise normal people from social constraints, allowing them to say things both undeserved and beyond the pale.

Tuesday, March 13, 2007

speed socks


Cowgirl slipper socks
Originally uploaded by jacquichris.
Monday night i made the other cowgirl sock while puzzling through a problem. they are in fact quite yummy. they are the Cowgirl slipper socks from Interweave Winter 2006 edition knit in Ry Classic Silk Wool DK in Brownstone. in the non-digital world, they really are the color of New England brownstones. keep your fingers crossed that they wash well.

also, sorry about the missing info on the country socks! i forgot to transfer it over from the photo file! those socks were made with adapted use of the Country Socks pattern from Nancy Bush's Folk Socks. i knit them using Ecco Extrafine merino in #201.

been working on the fish socks. once you get your head around the pattern, they are actually quite fun to knit. a little hard on the arms maybe, but that probably is more that i am obsessively over-knitting. eventually i will sleep again and maybe not look like the undead snowpeople on Kylie's Christmas stocking, but right now i knit.

got the first comments from my boss re the dissertation. not too bad. only two things that i will need to sort out. won't get the comments on the three remaining chapters until Friday (at the earliest). it is due to the committee Tuesday. things may be tight...

also got the galleys for a scientific article that has been in press for almost a year and is a chapter in the dissertation. one thing particularly entertaining about peer-reviewed publications is that the journal takes 2-3 months to get back to you about anything (at best) but you have to respond within 48 hours when it is your turn. [grouse grouse grouse.]

...

you are right. i tend to respond at that speed anyway. hate having things on the To Do list. but still, it is the principle of the matter.

Monday, March 12, 2007

big day

today is an exciting day. today i officially no longer have to view Mr. Head like this:


today is officially his first non-radioactive day. this means i no longer have to play extreme nuclear Russian roulette with the 100+ year old plumbing and can dispose of his urine normally.

hoo rah!

TraV and i both spent the weekend feeling pretty crappy. we went to Denver Roller Dolls showdown against Kansas City on Friday. i worked on a 'Comfort Scarf' i got from Carodan Farms. [the yarn is sold at cost, you knit the scarf and then the scarf is packaged in a gift bag and provided to a local cancer center.] the yarn i received is a lovely red long eyelash yarn. unfortunately, as the scarf knit out, i realized i hadn't picked big enough needles and it was looking disturbingly like Elmo meets Silence of the Lambs. i frogged it Saturday, and let me tell you that was fun.


Country socks
Originally uploaded by jacquichris.
i did finish up these puppies, which are much prettier in person than i was able to capture. and soft. so soft.

i also made un petit soupcon for someone special. it is a surprise so i can share nothing more on that front. i also started a pair of the Pomatomus socks, inspired by Lene. finally, i knocked out one of a pair of Cowgirl Slipper socks when my head was hurting too much to concentrate on a serious pattern. they are going to be just yummy to wear.


as you can imagine, i could not do this all on my own. fortunately, i had a lot of help...


Family knitting
Originally uploaded by jacquichris.

Thursday, March 08, 2007

twitchy


Cabled socks for Mom
Originally uploaded by jacquichris.
man, i have felt weird all day. i felt like an overstimulated, overcaffeinated, vibrating at high frequency crystal chittering squirrel facing a tax audit with a sugar high. completely incapable of concentrating on my scientific reading, completely incapable of sitting still.

eventually i cemented myself on the couch with my legs pinned beneath me and a movie playing to knit like a maniac. i think i am better but, since my legs are still hopping like babies in a bouncy chair, the improvement seems relative. i wanted to get these socks finished so i can get them in the mail as a pick-me-up for Mom. socks at warp speed. good times. but they are done. i am really pleased with how they turned out. don't they seem like the happiest socks ever?


Mittens for Lappin
Originally uploaded by jacquichris.
these i finished over the weekend since i really needed to blow off some nervous energy. my boss questioned my decision to give them to him before my defense... what if i didn't pass? i might not want to give him a present then. i pointed out it may be too warm to use them by the time my defense is past. he agreed it was sound thinking, paused a moment, and then asked if they were a bribe. sheesh.



random aside to Denise: i have reviewed the PhD manners book, and pompoms are definitely acceptable! i am thinking crazy variegated stripey colors because it has been a crazy mish mosh of a PhD project. boy, is it exciting to know i have a cheering section!

Wednesday, March 07, 2007

ambiguous? maybe not.

so, my boss has started reading my dissertation. i had told him i considered the protein results huge but i would not share them in advance. i, of course, have since worried that i overstated things and he would be disappointed in the results.

thus far today, i have received three emails from him. the first:

HOLY SHIT....you are going to be famous! WOW!

later dudettee....perseverance.....pays......wahoo

then three minutes later:
Will you be able to withstand the impulse to say I TOLD YOU SO...to Dr. AA?

and finally two minutes after that:
I am going to ask the person that asked me to speak to the nephrology group to let you and I do it together......I will give the lead in on the work that preceeded the protein stuff and then introduce you to DROP THE BOMB!

the question is, do you think i overstated things?

[insert picture of me smiling]

Step 1: Check

last night i got the first complete draft of my dissertation in to my boss. now i study and wait for his feedback. then frenetic revisions and dissemination to the committee March 20th.

for a variety of reasons, it is a relief to have it in...

Thursday, March 01, 2007

knitting and the chasm

the plumber and the tinner arrived early yesterday morning. after a long discussion regarding the relative merits of tearing a second hole in a potential load-bearing wall or the kitchen floor, they finally decided instead to expand the existing already large hole. happily, they were much more quiet than anticipated, and i was actually able to get some writing done.

also, this weekend i tried to knock out the mittens for my boss. can i just say the man has aberrantly large hands? i tore back once to increase their size, found they were still going to be too small, and decided to make fingerless gloves for TraV first since the yarn was turning out a pretty pattern in Black Watch colors. i intended to do those next, but whatever. they are very plain by his request so he won't catch them on things at work and shred them too quickly. they still seem to have turned out well.


Trav's fingerless gloves
Originally uploaded by jacquichris.
and no. i did not have my boss locked in the closet for measuring. i took a tracing of his hand and have been trying to make it 3D by scrunching up my face to blur the edges.

i did end up completely one of the mittens and the ribbing for the other, but i want to confirm fit before i make the second and add the finish detail.

i also set to work on a pair of cabled socks for a dear friend to whom i owe much since i had a three hour lecture to attend. they are snug but don't slip this way. the problem is that i ended up knitting on 0s instead of 2s as the yarn allegedly calls for and i am not going to have enough yarn. i went back four times to the yarn store before successfully being there when it was open.

Cabled sock
Originally uploaded by jacquichris.
in the interim, the owner sold all the yarn to a woman that will be opening a yarn store in a nearby town in a couple of months. now, that obviously won't work. so the question is whether i order another skein online and hope the lots are close enough to not be obvious or whether i frog it back and redo as a shorter sock. hmm.

Thursday, February 22, 2007

i can seeeee you!

as you can see, my big hole arrived today. i know you are jealous that you too cannot have such a marvelous gaping maw in your kitchen,* but they are reserved for special people like me.

in exciting news, they were able to tear everything out while limiting the porthole between the upstairs and my apartment to the kitchen. this means i can continue to shower without having to worry about collecting a cover charge.

in other exciting news, the plumber graciously agreed not to cut the sewer pipe until he is ready to cap it so that i don't have 'sewer vapors' wafting through the apartment for an undisclosed period of time. that this item required serious discussion completely baffles me. but i am weird like that.


*honestly, i am impressed that they managed to make it so tidy. it certainly didn't start out that way.

how happy he will be...


Stripey socks for TraV
Originally uploaded by jacquichris.
tonight i finished TraVy's first pair of handmade socks. they took longer than i would have liked because i kept decreasing needle size until i liked the way the pattern lay in the round. unfortunately, that meant i knit these puppies on US 0s. oy.

i also finished that last preemie set for the Warm Hearts, Warm Babies handoff tomorrow.

next to finish up: mittens for my boss. well, those and my dissertation.

Wednesday, February 21, 2007

[blink]

my upstairs neighbor was evicted last month. this would be irrelevant to me but my landlady is taking advantage of this opportunity to gut and improve the apartment.

the downsides are:

  • incredibly huge pieces of lumber regularly careen from above to crash into the ground outside my living room. this makes concentration on my writing almost impossible.

  • i have been informed i will soon have an extremely large hole in my kitchen wall that will extend into the ceiling and remain in 'hole' form an extended period of time before being closed.

the upsides are:
  • incredibly huge pieces of lumber regularly careen from above to crash into the ground outside my living room. this creates a certain sense of action movie danger and/or amusement.

  • apparently i will soon have a washer and dryer in my kitchen. well, as soon as the impending hole of doom is closed.


i also have the dubious pleasure of conversations like this:
me: "Just so you know, one of the cats may be in hospital for several days so don't panic if you can't find that one." (me pointing at Mr. Head)

plumber: "Why don't you lock the cats in your bedroom so we don't risk losing them tomorrow."

me: "No problem. I just wanted you to know about Mr. Head in case you need to get in on the weekend since he won't be here."

plumber: "I won't be looking for the cats if I am here. I have no reason to go into your bedroom. When I have no reason to go somewhere, I don't. I find that helps with keeping things simple."

me: "Um, okay. I wasn't going to lock them in the bedroom indefinitely but..."

VERY LOUD CRASH from above and then slightly less loud WHIMPERING

me: "Maybe you better check on Ray?...

I hope he is okay."

[awkward silence]

plumber: "This is why he is missing fingers...

And a vertebrae...

You knew that right?"

me: [blink blink]

plumber: I guess I'd better go look."

chasing the high

yesterday, something wonderful happened. not quite as wonderful as falling in love but close... i got the results back from my protein isolation.

things that are wonderful about my results:

  • even though i did not manage to get all three bands, all three proteins were still present in sufficient quantity in the sample to be sequenced [which really says alot about the specificity of Western blots if you think about it].

  • the proteins identified thus far appear to make sense, not that i want to jinx anything here.

  • antibodies against one of the proteins identified have been associated with multiple immune-mediated diseases in humans, including nephritis. this supports the protein's identity and provides an independent degree of support for my hypothesis that these antibodies are associated with immune-mediated disease in cats.


overall, the results appear to be everything a girl could possibly want. they validate that my research hasn't been total bunk (which i was starting to secretly wonder) and indicate it may in fact be pivotal work. the kind of work that changes things. again, not that i want to jinx anything.

as you can imagine, i felt incredible yesterday. by ten last night though, the high had mostly dissipated. i am recapturing it a bit this morning as i read the human literature on my proteins, but it certainly isn't the same.

i find myself thinking, 'A year of struggle to purify the proteins and the high can't last a bit longer? Sheesh.'

Friday, February 16, 2007

miscellania

as my last few posts have probably already made clear, things are a bit crazy around here. since things always happen all together, that of course means there are many things about which i have not posted. most of these are more of the same but there are two items (of unequal importance) that are not.


Christmas stockings
Originally uploaded by jacquichris.
the lesser item of note is that i finished Hailey's stocking. of course, as i made my way into turning the heel, i suddenly realized that the entire colorwork section was meant to be knit flat. this error partially resulted from the spotty nature of the pattern and partially from my own inability to recognize that the fact that knitting the colorwork in the round while managing the tension was positively hideous just might mean something was awry. Mickey would have chuckled herself silly if she was here to see me. (she helped me map the colorwork on my stocking a few years ago when i first decided to try this.)

the foot was completed at what seemed like lightspeed after the long-suffering misery of the leg Saturday night.

then i sat for awhile and contemplated frogging the entire thing and reknitting it to maximize its perfection. i decided that the story and suffering really better capture the love of a handmade Christmas stocking and put it away from me.


for Hailey and Kylie
Originally uploaded by jacquichris.
being me, i kept returning in my mind to how much faster and more painfree the work should be if knit flat. knowing that i intended to eventually make one this year for Kylie (my other nieceling), i finally caved and decided to do it now. late Saturday night, i cast on and worked most of the name. Sunday i lazed about with TraV and knit. i decided the stockings should not be identical and put children on the top of Kylie's. this decision i regretted almost immediately because the first two versions looked like ghouls and had to be frogged lest they inspire recurrent nightmares.* even with that challenge, i finished the stocking by midday. it took half the time, at most, of Hailey's.

*TraV still thinks they will lead Kylie's imagination into dark alleys given her quick wit and great zest for living. i stoutly maintain they represent a family of vegetarian Quaker snowpeople who would hurt no one.

i am now finishing up TraV's stripey socks, a pair of mittens for my boss, and a preemie set in time for the Thursday drop. oh yeah, and writing my dissertation. superfun!

in other, bigger, shinier news, Monday was TraV's and my first anniversary of dating. of course, we have packed this week full of celebratory goodness in the form of dentist and 'girlie' doctor appointments, exorbitant transmission blow-outs and committee meetings, preparatory blood work for Mr. Head's procedure* and scientific presentations, and planning meetings with the plumber who is going to tear a hole in my kitchen wall and ceiling to fix the upstairs apartment. if only everyone got to have our romantic rock-n-roll lifestyle. still, we are getting by, still adore each other, and have said very little we will regret.

*he 'gets' to have radioactive iodine therapy to ablate an overactive thyroid. wa-hoo! glow, kitty, glow!

Tuesday, February 13, 2007

that clanging from the ocean floor, its me

today in my committee meeting, we set the date for my PhD defense.

as soon as i left the meeting, i started to feel nauseous.

one would think this might have something to do with the two sets of letters... one of my committee members will be attending by teleconference. because the Final Examination Results form has to be turned in basically within a day, i have been instructed to send two sets of forms to Marty. he will then sign one set in the pass column and one set in the fail column and return them for use after the defense has been completed.

Tim, one of my other committee members, said we can celebrate if i pass by burning all the 'Fail' forms. i said, 'Sure. And then we can go scout around in the hallway for my stomach lining.'

realistically, i don't think this is why i feel the walls closing in on me. it is the combination of a ticking clock with outstanding lab results. the committee agreed on a Plan B dissertation structure in case the protein isolation is unrewarding, which is nice. it doesn't change my inability to write up the results and overarching conclusions until i know *something*. [did i mention that the machine used to sequence the protein is currently on the fritz?]

all in all, it is good to have a plan, good to have a framework of expectations...

still, i feel like a naval officer in a top secret nuclear submarine stranded on the ocean floor with 96 hours of oxygen and no one knowing that i am even missing.

[so that you can play along at home, i have installed a countdown timer in the right sidebar.]

a break in my lab luck?

as some of you may know, i have basically spent the last year trying to purify 1-3 proteins so they can be identified. this is the last lingering torment of my PhD. to date, i have tried 3 completely different methodologies and something like 20 combinations of reagents, incubation conditions and antibody preps each. early in the fall i got one methodology to yield one of the bands, but that particular technique yielded a huge overweighting of immunoglobulin. this became my back-up, my Plan B.

when all other options were exhausted, i conceded defeat and decided to harvest the one band from Plan B. my world was completely rocked when i discovered that the protein was not present in great enough density to visualize using the less sensitive stain necessary for protein isolation. efforts to concentrate the solution further actually caused the band to disappear.

these results left me teetering in shock, wondering whether perhaps i am not PhD material.

with no other ideas and nowhere to turn, i decided to call the woman to whom i would be submitting a successful sample to see if perhaps she had any ideas. Jessica is fabulous and, after validating that this is hard to do and that many people don't succeed, came up with several great ideas. since one involved learning a fourth methodology entirely and one might compromise the sample quality, i decided to start with the easy option. i reduced my antibody concentration to 3% of the original recommendations. (note: this was not a scientific level of decrease but instead reflected the most i could decrease the antibody concentration without having to make a separate stock dilution. basically, i was disheartened and lazy.]


A protein road map
Originally uploaded by jacquichris.
this magically led to a 1:1 ratio of antibody to protein, which is ideal but makes no sense given the initial starting concentrations and initial band densities. after magic autosubstraction using Photoshop, we are left with this clear illustration of three bands in the right lane. the top is a bit of a mystery band, the middle is the antibody band and the bottom band is my proteinaceous holy grail.

of course the concentration of protein in my sample was far too minute to show up using the cursed (pronounced cur-sed in the style of movie villains) Coomassie stain.

so i spent three days running the column over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over again...

...on the same lysate sample since i knew there was plenty of protein in the sample, just a persnickety recalcitrance on the part of the antibody to bind it. yesterday afternoon, knowing i was headed to a committee meeting today and uncertain of how hard to campaign for a failed experiment chapter in my dissertation, i decided to run what i had. before i started, i instructed Jen (my patient, supportive and awesome labmate/friend) to remind me i expected it not to work when it ended up failing. by the time Jen left for the night, i had 20 minutes destaining to go and it was a pretty obvious failure, so she consoled me and i took it well.

twenty minutes later, this is what i slid out onto the glass in preparation to through it in the trash.


A break in my lab luck
Originally uploaded by jacquichris.
and there it was. my sweet, sexy, playful, perfect friend - the ~40 kD band.

you are looking at the blob of slimy goo and thinking, 'She is truly unhinged. There is nothing there.'

but it was obvious when held at an angle with the light shining through it. i dragged my advisor down to witness the glory of the band before i cut it out to save for Jessica. unfortunately, to avoid potential keratin contamination (read failed experiment), i could not risk taking it to the image capture system for a photo. so i did the best i could with my camera through the plexiglass hood and without a mount.

if you squint your eyes up till you feel a headache coming on and use the membrane at the top of the post as a guide, you can almost believe what you are seeing on this photo, annotated for your viewing pleasure...



i could cry. i could laugh. i could laugh until i cry.

Jen and i are going for margaritas at the Rio on Saturday to to celebrate. you are welcome to join us.

Monday, February 05, 2007

today is my birthday.

the last few years, bad things have happened on my birthday and although the rational me understands that that does not mean all birthdays will suck, the human part of me was fearful. after a long yesterday spent reflecting on what has been lost and what has been gained these past few years, i was able to approach sleep with some equanimity.

the day broke with a call from my Mom wishing me the best of days, proceeded with joy and laughter and the company of friends, and has ended quite uneventfully. my emotions swing from halting disbelief to a giddy feeling that the dark, dark chapter has finally closed.

i have been quiet of late for so many reasons and know there is much to share, but for tonight i would rather just leave you with this shot of my cake. enjoy!

Monday, January 29, 2007

who knew i would become a multi-project kind of girl?


Preemie sets
Originally uploaded by jacquichris.
after a flurried frenzy of Christmas knitting, i took a couple deep breaths... and started back in. although i made a variety of things for charity in honor of special friends, that didn't take care of my public service needs. so to start, i made a couple of preemie sets...

i made a couple burial buntings...


Burial bunting
Originally uploaded by jacquichris.
then i felt a lot better about drifting back to less altruistic projects.

Behold! my first pair of socks. i know what you are thinking. you are thinking, 'Why on earth would anyone make socks when you can buy them for two dollars?'

well, i was as sick as sick gets for a while there and reading The Yarn Harlot's books where she waxes poetically about socks. this reminded me of Mickey telling me she used to make all of Grandpa's socks - argyles no less. it just seemed a great way to connect to Mickey's past and i thought it might help me over the stumbling blocks i had trying to make Hailey's stocking last year. i think they turned out pretty cool.


My first socks
Originally uploaded by jacquichris.
the best way to really learn something is to do it twice but i wasn't quite ready to make TraV the matching socks he wanted. that is just an awful lot of one shade of blue (on US 1's - no less).

did you know they make a magical thing called self-patterning sock yarn? it is pretty slick but you do have to get the gauge right for the pattern to be 'just so'. sadly, that meant that these are being knit on US 0's.


Self-patterning Socks
Originally uploaded by jacquichris.


a bit like magic. which is saying something since i still find knitting a magical wonder - you just wiggle your hands for a while and fabric appears. its slow magic, i'll grant you, but magic nonetheless. the other cool thing about yarn with stripes or a pattern is that it accentuates the structure of the sock.

well, a girl can only knit so much on US 0's before her fingers start rebelling. i was going to start work on a pair of slippers but didn't have the right needle size. how that is possible is a mystery for me. here i have been knitting twenty years and yet it seems every project requires a new needle. with one and 1/3 pairs of socks under my belt, i felt emboldened to return to the stocking i frogged last year and give it another whirl. to decrease frustration, i bought a second set of needles (US 6, thank heavens) so i didn't have to knit against tension and deployed a liberal amount of yarn bobbins.


Hailey Christmas stocking
Originally uploaded by jacquichris.
it is coming along nicely i think. it won't exactly match the ones my Great-grandmother Margaret made for my brother and me, but it will be pretty close. of course, making one commits me to making three. Hailey cannot have one while Kylie and Cailee have none. happily i have about ten months and Cailee is young enough that hers can wait till the next year if necessary.

i also cast on the slippers last night but temporary stupidity led to a big enough error that i frogged it and will have to start again later. the bright shining ray of joy? US 15's baby! (and i really need a new pair of slippers.)

pretty weird for a girl that believes in serial projects, but one cannot live on US 0's alone and evade carpal tunnel forever.

Monday, January 22, 2007

aww, they liked me!


today i arrived home to find this waiting in my mailbox...



and there was more on the back.

i almost cried.

how very lucky i am.

Friday, January 12, 2007

defeating the 'death crud' going around this month

finally starting on the upswing, i have compiled some tips for surviving the Cold of Doom that seems to be circulating coast to coast right now...

1. start the nasty zinc lozenges as soon as you think you might be getting a scratchy throat and don't know why you can't shake that headache. maybe you are not getting sick but why risk it? they are proven to make colds go away faster. by the time i knew i was actually getting sick, i was too sick to pick them up.
2. hot apple cider is easier on a sore throat than OJ and has the same amt of vit C.
3. DayQuil should be taken with food in the stomach. trust me. it is better to eat dry instant oatmeal than take this on an empty stomach. if the first dose doesn't get you, the second will.
4. NyQuil is not a good choice for this cold. remember when Jane Grey got slimed by Toad in the first X-men movie? nuff said.
5. as disgusting as it feels, nothing beats Vicks VapoRub. the shower version is helpful but a tablet is probably good for three or four showers - after 5 minutes, the intensity of the aroma will make you nauseous. [Note: if combined with disregard for #3, expect a burgeoning and intimate relationship with a different fixture in the bathroom.]
6. Mucinex is a good thing. combine with DayQuil for maximal relief.
7. Kleenex with lotion and aloe is your new best friend.
8. you can microwave your buckwheat/rice pack and drape on neck for soothing itch/pain relief without the mess of a poultice.
9. noodle soup can only take you so far. eventually you are going to need protein.
10. you can sleep sitting up if you have enough pillows. in the end you will get more rest than if you alternate between partial asphyxiation and lying down.

Tuesday, January 09, 2007

being sick sucks

because i didn't have enough 'fun' when i was sick in December and had to go to hospital, i now have the mother of all colds. i have a croupy cough with miserable congestion and voice loss. my throat feels about how i imagine tenderized meat would, if it happened to still be alive and able to report back on the experience.

i finally had to cave and pick up the Quils, since i haven't slept in two days and the cough drops are only kind of helpful. (i have been avoiding this since they ironically give me a headache.) how crappy i feel was driven home to me when the checkout clerk said, and i quote,

"I hate to say this to a woman, but you look like you feel terrible. Do you need us to get you a ride home?"

sheesh.

wish me luck finding my voice to conclude negotiations with UTK this afternoon...

Saturday, January 06, 2007

Cabled dog sweater knitting pattern

so, i decided to make Glenn a sweater for Christmas, but all the patterns i could find were either too fluffy, too ugly, or unuseful as an actual warming device. after reviewing a large number of patterns in books and online, i ended up synthesizing a pattern of my own. the Patons yarn i used totally rocks for this and wasn't the tiniest bit itchy.

enjoy!




Cabled dog sweater
Originally uploaded by jacquichris.
MATERIALS:
US Size 5 and 7 knitting needles (or size needed to match gauge)
Cable stitch holder
Worsted weight yarn, preferably natural fibers to limit risk of skin irritation: ~ 4 ounces for smaller dog, up to 8 ounces for larger dog. I recommend Paton’s Classic Merino Wool.

Gauge: 8 stitches by 14 rows = 2” x 2” on larger size needles.

Measurements:
NOTE: Before starting, you will need to record all the below measurements for your dog. Using a soft tape measure (not a ruler) applied loosely, take the below measurements and record where indicated. This will save time and stress later on.

Neck (about where the collar hits): ____

Size 1 2 3 4 5
Neck circumference 8” 10” 12” 14” 16”
Stitches to cast on 36-38 40-42 44-46 48-50 52-54

Back (from top of shoulder blade all the way to the top of the tail): ____
Chest:
Distance between front legs: ____
From thoracic inlet (pointy tip of bone in the end of the neck) to top of front leg: ____
Whole belly piece:
Male dog: From thoracic inlet to the second to last rib: ____
Female dog: From thoracic inlet to front of the back leg: ____
Front arm hole length: From front of leg to back of leg (be slightly generous): ____

Back piece:
Using smaller needles, loosely cast on ___ stitches as determined by the chart above.
Alternate K2, P2 ribbing until:
1 ½” if want short mock neck for shorter necked dog or dog needing to wear an Invisible Fence or bark collar.
3” if want mock neck for longer necked dog or short turtleneck for dog described above.
6” if want full turtleneck.

Change to larger size needles. Work in stockinette stitch, inserting cables as follows:
For sizes 1 and 2, center 2 smaller cables (4 stitches apiece) separated by 6 stitches in the right side of the piece (see below). For the larger sizes, I would recommend centering 2 larger cables (in parentheses).
Row 1 (right side): Knit.
Row 2: Purl.
Row 3: Place 2 (3) stitches on cable holder and place behind. Knit 2 (3) stitches then knit stitches off of the cable holder.
Row 4: Purl.

Continue in pattern until total length is 2" short of the correct length as measured above.
Switch to smaller size needles and knit 2" of K2, P2 ribbing used for the neck above. Cast off.

Chest piece:
Using the smaller size needles, cast on 3 stitches.
Row 2: Purl.
Row 3: K1, M2 in next stitch, K1. (5st)
Row 4: Purl.
Continue in stockinette, increasing 1 stitch on each edge of right-sided rows as follows: K2, M1, K to last 3 stitches, M1, K2.
When you reach the width indicated between the front legs, stop increasing. Work in straight stockinette until you reach 1 inch shy of the total chest length you noted above.
Work the last inch in K2, P2 ribbing as for the neck.
Work 6 stitches in ribbing and place on a stitch holder, then bind off stitches until you get to the last 6 stitches. Work these stitches in ribbing until the total length including this edge matches that of the back piece. Bind off.
Pick up 6 stitches from the stitch holder and work in ribbing until length matches other side. Bind off.

Finish work:
Sew the neck seam, remembering to sew halfway down on the right-side and switch then to the inside for a turtleneck.
Place the chest piece at the bottom of the neck rib, and sew a seam down both sides, until the chest piece length is equal to the thoracic inlet-leg measurement.
Leave an opening for the front legs equal to the length you noted above and continue the seams down each side to the bottom.
Weave in loose ends.
Pick up 4 stitches on the bottom of the back ribbing at the corner (see photo if confused). Knit in stockinette until stirrup is appropriate length to fasten where the ribbing started without pulling on the dog’s groin. This particular measurement should be made with the sweater on the dog.
Attach the stirrup by Ktog the stirrup stitches with the four stitches directly above the ribbing on the back piece while binding off.
Pick up four stitches on the other corner and knit other stirrup to match.
Weave in ends and block.

Options:
If in an area with high snowfall, consider picking up stitches around front leg openings and knitting in K2 P2 ribbing 1-3 inches.
Instead of knitting the neck in rib, for a polo or rugby style, knit neck in K1P1 ribbing or reverse stockinette (P on ‘right side) for 3-5 inches. Start the neck seam 1 inch from the bottom, and fold down the top to make a collar. In this case, eliminate cables and knit in stockinette in alternating large and narrow stripes of gray and blue.